My birthday is coming soon.
I will be 58 years old on September 10th.
During the past few months I have been experiencing anxiety attacks, in all shapes and forms, about my new age, as it is right around the bend from the BIG one, 60.
I have dreams in which I am 62, and have woken up believing that I was 62 years old and completely disoriented as I tried desperately to understand
where all the years had gone and how this had happened. It took me well over an hour to realize that I was in fact not 62, but 57. However, the feeling of being old and in the way
remained with me and I clearly believed that all the good things in life were behind me, all the mad crazy adventures over and done with, all the places in the world I wanted to go would never be seen.
For some unknown reason, I felt that my time was really over. I stopped doing yoga, I stopped hiking, I started sleeping in ( something I have never done ). I started to eat massive amounts of Ben and Jerry’s Cake Batter ice cream. I would literally go to Ralph’s after dinner, in my pajamas tucked into my sweats and buy 2 or 3 pints and a box of sugar cones and come home and eat until I couldn’t anymore.
I was miserable and it wasn’t going away, this feeling of dread this feeling of fear.
One morning I awoke to The Great Awakening. I realised that my life and the way I lived it it had nothing to do with numbers.
I understood for the first time that I am finally at a time in my life where I am better than ever. A time where I can own all the different variations of myself I have been.
I can own the messy divorces and not feel (finally!) that they were all entirely my fault.
New York, Paris, Jamaica, Africa Los Angeles, Inverness, they were all part of who I am now.
I have worked very hard to support myself and my children and I take great pride in this.
And now I am recreating myself in my new business Clothespin. It is very hard work but so is everything that you are passionate about.
I can appreciate the incredible life I have had and the incredible life I am having right now-
Most importantly, I truly feel that we, as women, can embrace, forgive, and love ourselves for who we really are, no exceptions.
I will be 58 soon, without botox, or lifts. Instead, I will embrace the woman that I am and practice a lot of meditation, yoga, hike and continue to be passionate about life.
So ladies, whatever age, you are lovable beautiful people…
let the fear go, for you never know what tomorrow brings.
I’m a freshman at Woodbury University, majoring in Fashion design and Minoring in Business. Never have I imagined of becoming a designer. As I was practicing my sewing this morning (I have never touched an industrial mechaine before) I came upon a news paper and began reading an article in which was about you and how you came about to your present.
Getting to where I am now has been a great big fight for me. Each day I am fighting the negative possibilities and out comes that can occur and are accruing. Coming from a family of two has never been easy to maintain in this BIG universe. Although I am very lucky to have my mom and sister, I have become their inspiration and light as to pursuing ones passion. My family may not be rich in money, but we surly are rich in spirit. I never imagined nor dream of going into a private university and major as a Fashion Designer with a minor in business. I have never been interested in clothing, since my mom never really had much money to buy me clothes other than food and a place to call “home.” As of now I’m still not interested in clothing or Fashion. What interest me is begin able to create and put my soul into fabrics and just make something beautiful and comfortable for the human body. I have no experience in sewing or drawing, which has been very challenging for me. I know I am not good at it now, but it is something that I can learn; it is just knowledge that can be maintain.
The reason why I am telling you this is because I am a young woman wanting to experience and grasp everything I need in order to create. My greatest passion is to create and design. We all are artist and are always creating. I actually do not see any need for me to go to school to be able to design and create; I believe creation comes from ones integrity and the experiences of life. One does not need knowledge to feel, see, smell, taste, and open up to the great wonders and beauty of life. So why am I here at Woodbury University? I am here because I want to learn and get the knowledge I need in order to go out into the world and be able to communicate with others. Which is why I would like for you to give me some of your knowledge so I can go about into the world and create beautiful, unique, and comfortable garments for humanity.
You sure are in no doubt a wise women whom has come this far to have her own line, which is why I am asking if you can sort of be a mentor and give me some feed back as to what the Fashion industry is all about.
PS. “I don’t think about ages, I think about women. What it means to be modern, how women feel, how they live, because beauty and sensuality comes from within, numbers mean nothing, you can have an old soul in a young body or a young soul in an older one, it’s about the experience, the universality of women.” (Donna Karan) Happy Birthday…live every moment!!!!!
Living every moment!
That was really beautiful. Thanks!
You can definitely see your enthusiasm in the work you write. The world hopes for more passionate writers like you who aren?¯t afraid to say how they believe. Always go after your heart.
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